I don’t get my hair cut very often, but when I do, I usually fall into the trap of being wowed by some amazing spray or gel or other delightfully aromatic product that the hairdresser applies to my hair in a business-like fashion.
What’s that? I say. Does it make it easier to comb?
The hairdresser agrees with all my assumptions about wonderness of product, cuts and blow-dries my straggly locks to give them that rare salon-finish, and shows me the back of my head in the mirror.
I put my glasses on and then she shows me the back of my head again.
It looks just as I would expect the back of my head to look, so I pretend to understand why she is showing me the back of my head in the mirror, and then go to pay.
At that point, I always accidentally pick up a jar of the wonder-product, and place it on the counter, confident that just owning it will make my hair continue to look salon-finished for the next twelve weeks.
The wonder-product invariably costs almost as much as the haircut itself. See exhibit A: Item on the left cost about £10 over a year ago, still three-quarters full; Item on the right a whopping £12.10, this weekend.
Haircut on Sunday. Salon-finished look gone by Monday morning.
Red Ken? Is that “distilled essence of former GLC leader”? Does it smell of newts?
Mmm, yes, squirt on the unmistakeable scent of 21st-century Socialism, together with a tantalising hint of newt.
The bed-head is very appropriate to my authoricon, which features me lying in bed on my birthday last year.
I know exactly what you mean. I have a bottle of TIGI straightening balm (costing a tenner and still more than half full) from when I last had my hair cut at Toni & Guy in High Wycombe, and I moved away from there five years ago. I just can’t be arsed with styling. My salon look only holds for as long as I can hold out washing my hair after it’s been cut.
By working in a college, I’ve discovered why teenagers always have such perfect hair these days. I asked a few when I was enrolling them and found out that it takes one hour of straightening with various salon products and some GHD straighteners to achieve the sleek look at home. When you are 16, you have time for that. I, as previously mentioned, can’t be arsed.
Quite. Agreed on both counts. The damn stuff is too expensive to use, and anyway I can’t be arsed.