April 26, 2013

Uborka Book Day Cocktails

Once again, we’re doing cocktails in the style of a fast food drive through. I’m at this window, taking your orders, and Karen’s at that window delivering them to you in a greasy brown paper bag. You must make sure to drive very slowly between the two windows though, as they won’t be ready for 6.5 hours.

As the parent of a 6 year old who, for some reason, absolutely hates fancy dress, one of the letters that we don’t look forward to receiving from school is the one that says “next week is World Book Day, your child should come to school dressed up as their favourite character from a book!” Well, Uborka readers, today we’re being a shower of bastards and laying that on you. Along with your cocktail order, tell us which character from a kids book you are dressed as ((by the way, to assuage any fears you might have, remember that this is the internet and if you claim to be dressed as an oompa loompa, even though you’re actually not, then no-one will ever know the difference)).

Have fun! ((or don’t, who cares, have a shit time for all I care))


15 thoughts on “Uborka Book Day Cocktails

  1. As always, I’m dressed as Stig of the Dump.

    And on a literary front, I think the cocktail of choice today should be Hemingway’s “Death in the Afternoon“, which looks pretty potent.

  2. Hating fancy dress is a mark of good character, in my estimation. When I turned up at a horror themed fancy dress party as a child molester I was accused of not making an effort. The absence of a costume was an ingenious simulacrum of hidden horror, you fools. Also, I wasn’t making an effort.

    Anyway, my invite to this particular fancy dress party read as follows: “You can come to cocktail hour as Freud if you want to.” I’m not sure Freud counts as a character from a kids’ book, but they’re your rules… However, I read rather a lot of children’s literature at the moment on account of the inevitably voracious appetite for books of Pockless Junior, so I think it’s only fair that I should come as a character from one of his favourite’s.

    I’m the bear from “I Want My Hat Back”. As you can see, I’m not wearing a hat.

    Mine’s a pint.

  3. Well since I’m looking at an Edwardian House (to buy*) currently, I’ll come as King Edward** and have an Edwardian Style cocktail.

    * Yes I know this seems to be dominating my conversation right now. I’m sorry. I bet you all can’t wait till I have kids.
    ** Ok so I haven’t read the rule’s properly. I can come as Colin from The Secret Garden, as I read that at school, it was quite good, and should be relatively easy to dress up as.

  4. This is imaginary dressing up, so your costume can be as complex as you like.

  5. Since @miketd says I drive like him, I will be coming as Mr Toad. Re the tipple, I think an Edwardian favourite with a motoring theme would be appropriate:

    90% French Vermouth
    10% Absinthe
    2 dashes Maraschino
    Fill glass with cracked ice, shake, strain and serve.

    Oh, and just leave the Absinthe bottle on the bar for me.

  6. I’ll have a Vespa please. A double Vespa.

    With a shot of tequila or three on the side.

    Pass the nuts.


  7. Because I appreciate that he was both small AND fierce, as well as slavishly devoted to style, I am coming to this party dressed as Reepicheep. My drink should be, of course, a Sweetwater*.

    *eau de vie and pear liqueur, floated with Champagne and a cherry, served in a crystal flute.

  8. Cocktails are starting to interfere with our morning schedule. Hurry up and shower, my love.

    I’ll have a glass of red wine, Dragon Year, I think, as I’ll be dressed as Sparrowhawk from A Wizard of Earthsea.

  9. I wanted to be Eloise. When we went to the Plaza, my mother says I asked to see her. I’ll take a Manhattan.

  10. If we’re doing drinks drive through style then I’ll have a Brandy Alexander, as it’s practically a milkshake.

    And I’ll approach the drive through window on a broom dressed as meg from meg and mog.

  11. Ohh character, missed that. I’ll be the drunk Uncle in… whatever kids book has that as a character. Hic.

  12. I’ve come as Timmy the dog from the Famous Five books.

    But anyway, enough about my personal life. What I meant was, I’m dressed as Timmy the dog from the Famous Five books.

    I’ll have a bowl of water and some Pedigree Chum chaser, please.

  13. I’ll dress up as the Mad Hatter, and would therefore like an Earl Grey martini, please. S. can be Thea The Yellow Tomato, and so should have a Bloody Mary, and J. will be the Very Hungry Caterpillar and would like milk, straight up, no ice.

    And if I can throw in some extra uborkapoints to get a small birthday cupcake for S., then I would like to do so.

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