Three weeks ago I was diagnosed as having Asperger’s Syndrome or, more pedantically, an Autism Spectrum Condition as Asperger’s itself is no longer an official term. I still don’t really know how to feel about it: bemused at the turn of events; relieved to have answers to some puzzles in my life; confused by the questions that have been raised; guilty at feeling concerned and self-absorbed about something that is neither pain-inducing nor life-threatening; afraid of being judged for having a very “trendy” diagnosis; hesitant about having to explain everything again and again; cross for no apparent reason.
So I stand here watching the rain clouds looming over our house, blotting out the afternoon sun and shrouding the landscape in shadow. I see the bright clouds and the hints of blue sky in the distance and I think “There’s a metaphor here somewhere…”
I know where I am right now. I’m just no longer sure how I got here.