May 31, 2013

Introducing… K

Okay, what the fuck do you want?

This is K: I’m a non-blogger. I never really got it, apart from vicariously reliving our antics through Troubled Diva. However, I became an enthusiastic late adopter to Twitter as @ktd (oh, and I’ve been lazy with my alter ego, @feasance_miss).

I was introduced to this social media thing by my partner and co-counsellor @miketd. He now tells me off for spending too much time chatting to strangers. (“Where’s my dinner!”) I really don’t know where this came from, since I am an antisocial grump who prefers to swear and hide from the public. But then, the keyboard provides the perfect foil for the outside world – I really don’t like telling people to fuck off in person.

I’m a cell biologist with a dilettante research history. Basically, I am into finding new ways of diagnosing disease, principally that bastard cancer.

I do science because it’s what I’m best at, and it’s not too bad to make a contribution to health. That said, I’ve always been interested in all things creative, particularly the visual arts. Pictures are better for me since I struggle with worms.

I’m a bit of a cook, and I like my wine (both quality and quantity, as evidenced by late night Twitter obscenities). I love our garden. I like good clothes and design. I wouldn’t survive without Mr Porter, because that would involve interacting with the real world. Despite hating the real world, I’ve seen most of it. I used to love travelling, but now it’s just a pain in the arse.

I have an unhealthy obsession with contemporary studio ceramics – I come from Stoke on Trent. This causes @miketd anxiety, because he thinks we are running out of available surfaces.

So please come to me for embarrassing body issues (I’m a biologist), food, wine and restaurants (I’m a drunken glutton), gardening advice (I’m middle aged) and men’s sartorial questions (I’m gay). Also travel (boutique hotels only – did I say I’m gay?), interior design and great pots.

Footnote: I’m very cheap, but I don’t do budget.

Now fuck off and leave me alone.


7 thoughts on “Introducing… K

  1. If I wasn’t already sure of the fact before I got to the end of this post, the sign-off line would have finally convinced me: Best. Blog Post. Ever.

    We can all retire now. (I mean, we can all retire from blogging now if we haven’t done so already.)

  2. How much of the green bit do you have to cut off rhubarb? And can you suggest any good recipes for it?

  3. I’m becoming more and more convinced that K is a god in the guise of a rotten scheming drunken bastard. Which is probably why we get on so well.

  4. So….. What *is* the proper terminology to use when addressing…

    a) a doctor
    b) a politician and
    c) a peer of the realm?

  5. Kevin,
    While lovingly polishing your modern ceramics, may I suggest you clean your mouth out as well? Perhaps with a bit of Mr Sheen? Language, darling! My question: please give me a three course summer meal which won’t take up too much time and impress my guests. Being able to cook it on a bbq would be a plus. Suggestions for a summery cocktail to kick off with and something to sip at the end also appreciated. As well as any hangover cures with that you can back up with science. Finally, while we are at it, how does one look stylish yet keep warm when sitting outside during British summertime? I anxiously await your reply.

    American Deb on June 3, 2013
  6. If a recipe calls for garlic, and I haven’t got any, what can I use instead?

  7. Pingback: My week as an ‘Agony Aunt’ - Rarely Wears Lipstick

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