If the birthday cocktails are going to be thrown at me, as I fully anticipated they would, then we’re not serving anything with ice today. In fact, nothing cold at all. I hear several pleas for a hot toddy or something warm and medicinal, and actual cough medicine would be way too sticky, so I’ll just mull all the cocktails instead.

Lyle has opted to splash me with an appropriately cucumberish drink which sounds fairly unpleasant cold, and will probably be completely unpalatable hot. I don’t think I’ve ever had sake, but I understand that it is acceptable to heat it. It’s just the cooked cucumber that I’m wary of. Maybe we’ll skip that ingredient.

Hooray, especially for my birthday, Ade has turned up for cocktails today (they all crawl out of the woodwork when I mention “it’s my round.”) Like Lisa and Asta, Ade is having a hot drink. Not too hot, I don’t wish to be scalded. You three can huddle up and enjoy the heat from the birthday candle in this mince pie.

Googling “hot champagne” to find something for Clair led me to a slightly sketchy looking YouTube video and some M&S adverts, so I think we’ll just bung it in a saucepan with a vanilla pod and some honey, and see what comes out.

Star of this week’s Where Are They Now, Doctor Pockless cheekily offers the world’s most expensive cocktail to everyone in the bar. Luckily I am rich in imaginary bitcoins with which to pay for them. Such a shame what happened when I put them in the microwave, though.

Unsolicited cocktails this week for Pete, unable to be with us owing to pressures of work: he can have a warm beer. Also for Pixeldiva, who has sent me a birthday present that the whole family will enjoy. And a flaming sambuca for everyone who contributed a slow cooker recipe this week: wasn’t it fun!

I have had a perfectly nice day in which I bought shoes and a warm top, ate a second breakfast and ran the calories off later, and didn’t do much else. I think there will be curry later, but I don’t have to make it.