October 8, 2013

Great Uborka BakeAlong

It’s week 7, and on TV they were doing things with suet and choux pastry, which all looked very complicated. The best I managed with suet this week was to put dumplings on top of my steak and ale stew. Meanwhile Asta and Lisa have gone head to head once again, with their fancy-schmancy choux buns, some looking a little more nun-like than others:

asta chouxAsta’s religieuses: star baker once again.

I’d never attempted choux before because the mere thought of it filled me with fear. My mother used to tell tales of her mother’s baking prowess and would finish each story with, ” And she could even make choux pastries, so delicious nobody else in town would even attempt to make those” Obviously choux was the ultimate in skill.  By the time I hit my twenties, I should have factored in that my mother was a fair to horrible cook and that aside from the the annual Christmas cakes, she didn’t bake at all. 
I only started baking more than once or twice a year two years ago, and tentatively at that.  I only started to give it any real attention this past winter. So this week’s choux was alarming. Ganache and whipped cream are a snap, but the pastry and the creme filling were total unknowns to me.
 
I looked at Mary Berry’s recipe.  I followed her recipe for the choux, ( what do I know of pastry), but her recipe for the creme was ridiculous–6 egg yolks? No wonder she added cornflour, the stuff would have made mortar without it.
 I have a big ol’ French cookbook from the 80s that I hardly ever look at. I dug that out and it said three yolks and 1 egg were desired. Fine by me.
 
Results:   These are irreligieuse nuns, so it’s okay that they look like they’ve been in a bit of a fight. They were served at a dinner party with more whipped cream, and berries. I did not tell anyone I made them. I was asked for the name of the pastry shop because the questioner wanted to get some for a gathering next week. SCORE!

 

Lisa’s irreligieuses. lisa chouxChoux pastry from Delia’s recipe, blobbed with a dessertspoon not piped. Whipped cream/icing sugar (by eye) inside – cba with creme patiserie; and melted choc/cream on top. Not very fancy but taste good.

 

 

 

As usual I have completely ignored the brief, but made up for it in terms of quantity: ale loaf (pictured), rhubarb and marmalade crumble, eccles cakes, cheese and onion pasties, ciabatta and a chocolate sponge:

2013-10-03 18.05.35

Pixeldiva has produced a marvellous second birthday cake in the style of a gruffalo, from former GBBO-winner Jo Wheatley’s book:

gruffalo

This week’s episode is entitled ‘Grandad Grains,’ which apparently means more unusual types of flour. Let’s bake!

Karen
  • Comments: 2
  • Ignore word muddles, I'm just back from physio and it scrambles the brain as well as muscl... - asta
  • I find the phrase 'Grandad's Grains' more than a bit alarming. It sounds like something y... - asta
October 5, 2013

Berkshire Bara Brith

2013-09-30 18.09.45Ingredients

  • 450g/1lb strong white flour
  • 7g salt
  • 10g dried yeast
  • 75g/2½oz butter, softened
  • 50g/1¾oz brown sugar
  • 2 tsp mixed spice
  • 350g/12oz mixed dried fruit such as dates, apricots, blueberries, sultanas
  • 1 free-range egg
  • 1 chai teabag
  • 100ml milk
  • oil

Method

  1. Place the fruit and teabag in a large bowl, pour over boiling water, and leave.
  2. Put the flour, yeast, sugar, salt and spice in a large mixing bowl. Add the beaten egg. Take your measuring jug of milk and add another 100ml of the liquid from the soaking fruit. Add more water to the fruit if needed.
  3. Bring the mixture together to form a dough. Knead on a lightly oiled work surface until smooth. Place back in the bowl, cover with oiled cling film and leave until doubled in size – at least one hour.
  4. Preheat the oven to 200C/180C fan/400F/Gas 6 and grease a 900g/2lb loaf tin. Drain the fruit in a sieve or colander for several minutes to get excess moisture out. Don’t forget to remove the teabag.
  5. 2013-10-01 08.25.04Knock back the dough, then add the fruit. Knead until evenly distributed, then shape it and fit it into the loaf tin. Cover again with oiled cling film and prove for a further 30 minutes. Remove the cling film and bake in the centre of the oven for 20 minutes.
  6. Cover with aluminium foil and continue to bake for a further 25 minutes. Remove from the oven, turn it out of the tin and leave to cool on a wire rack for 20 minutes.
Karen
October 4, 2013

Cocktails: what else could possibly go wrong?

Now that we’ve finally found the key to the bar, do please come in. I am terribly sorry about the leaky roof and I think the cat has been sick on the carpet, but I haven’t had time to clean it up yet. It’s been disaster upon disaster, really, so let’s all get drunk [DrinkAware disclaimer, please be a grown up and make your own decisions].

The good news is, Asta‘s cooking; though she hasn’t had time to shop and most certainly hasn’t swept the floor, as you can see. It’s choux buns for dinner, though. In an attempt to create comfortable familiarity, Graybo can sit on that broken bench underneath the trickle coming from the ceiling. Hopefully at some point Mike will get that steam cleaner properly assembled and start sorting out this disaster zone. We make an excellent martini around here, but it won’t be very dry while those puddles are still forming. As well as martinis, and Pockers’ customary beer, we’re serving all the drinks off Asta’s list. In fact, once that bucket is empty, we’ll put them all in there.

On the plus side, Lyle is in such a good mood that he’s gone all superscripty, and if you haven’t seen Pockless‘ video of Twink’s Horse yet, then it’s about time you did. That will put a smile on your face. Have a super weekend, and don’t work too hard those of you who have to [me].

Karen
  • Comments: 1
  • So long as the choux buns don't turn into shoe leather, we'll be fine. - Lyle

Bar’s Open

With apologies for the late opening of the bar, today has been something of a rush. I was merrily coming to the end of my run around 9:10 this morning when I suddenly wondered whether, in fact, I was supposed to be running my workshop in Ascot at 10am rather than 11. A glance at my phone confirmed that this was in fact the case, so let’s see: still 5 minutes from home, sweating a river, haven’t printed the handouts or bought any milk, and it usually takes at least half an hour to get there. And today is a race day.

As the clock beside the church hall struck 10, I walked through the door. So not the smooth and efficient service I usually deliver, but I think I got away with it. Then I was stuck in traffic all the way home. The main theme of my day has been “oh, bugger.” So that’s the theme of our cocktails today: how have you come unstuck this week?

Karen
  • Comments: 9
  • Still better than watery cauliflower cheese, Mike. - Lyle
  • I spent five hours assembling a power-cleaner, blitzing the yard and the garden furniture,... - mike
  • Actually, this comment thread is turning into one of those "oh bugger" moments. - graybo
  • Well, I said please. But not thank you. - graybo
  • Gordon Jackson, I'm so rude. I forgot to say please and thank you. - graybo
October 3, 2013

Where are they now? An interview with StroppyCow

5110065067_1a6f9c83cd_zAre you living in the same place as in 2004/05?

I have moved 4 times since then. We are hoping to not have to move again for a little while, I like it here.

Would we recognise you if we passed you in the street?

Probably, I don’t think I have changed much beyond a few more wrinkles.

What predictions do you have for the future of social media/the internet?

If I spend too much time staring at Pinterest, I hope the internet equivalent of punk is on its way to liven up the homogeneity of it all.

I also hope that publishers will wake up and reshape the way they do business and realise that making it as hard as possible if not impossible for people to purchase content legally.

We all had a blog back then. Do you still have one, or are you mainly present somewhere else?

The blog has not been updated in years. I use Twitter mostly with a sprinkling of Facebook to keep in touch with family and friends who moved abroad or who know me IRL.

I tried to like Google+ but failed. I was put off by the insistence on a real name when I intended to use it in place of Twitter.

I have been tempted to start a new blog for those times when 140 characters are not enough but I don’t think I have the discipline to make it more than a collection of rants.

Tell us one goal you would like to achieve before your next birthday?

Get my 5k running time down to 30 minutes. Not sure why, it just seems like a nice round number. No idea what I’ll aim for after that.

Gert’s questions were:

There’s a fair age gap between your two children. Have you brought them up very differently, and how much of the Toddler’s upbringing is delegated to the Teenager?

They have very different personalities so we have had to adapt. The general guiding principles are the same but we are still very much learning how to raise an individual who is flamboyant, wears all his feelings on the outside and whose feelings are all very intense.

We think he finds us quite boring as a family. He likes people, company delights him and he will often walk up to other children in the park and ask them if they want to play with him and will happily chat to their parents too. We often wonder if he is trying work out if they would be a more suitable family for him and if he is trying to get them to adopt him.

The Teen does help. He changes the occasional nappy, he can handle the bedtime routine. He provides entertainment and distraction. I call it acquiring valuable life skills and reinforcing the message of the value of contraception, he calls it slavery. Potato, potahto.

You cycle quite a lot. Are you a Lycra Lout, or the dream demographic – suburban mum on a bike? (Or a bit of both?)

I like walking, riding a bike is just faster walking for when time doesn’t allow to cover the distance.

I don’t wear cycling gear, the type of riding I do doesn’t warrant it and I’m too stingy to buy single use items. I am sure if I rode longer distance I’d probably invest in a chamois but for journeys of 10 miles or so tops it seems overkill.

There’s a toddler bike seat on my bike and I have a basket so I guess suburban mum on a bike is a better descriptor than lycra lout.

The realisation recently that while I enjoy the freedom of getting on the bike to go from A to B I am not willing to afford my teenage son the same freedom should he wish to cycle to school. I would like for him and in time his brother to be able to ride in safety should they wish to without having to put themselves through the unpleasantness that is vehicular cycling.

I may become militant as I age, for now I support the campaign for childhood freedom http://www.childhoodfreedom.com/.

If she’s up for it, I’d like to ask Rachel Clarke:

  1. You are training for a marathon, what do you do to distract yourself when you train for longer distances?
  2. I am always surprised at how many job applicants have completely open Facebook profiles. Is there anything which surprises you time and time again when it comes to technological savviness from people who grew up with the technology?
Karen
October 2, 2013

Uborka Fitness Club

A fortnight ago we mooted the idea of expanding this into a general fitness club, which could then include more people. So now, whether you run, walk, cycle, swim, dance or play some sort of dreadful team game, please feel free to use this place to celebrate what you’ve done, bemoan what you haven’t, and generally get lots of support. Loads of SCIENCE ((I have no reference for this, but writing it in capitals makes it so)) says that having your achievements publicly acknowledged is greatly encouraging and motivating; and that is the entire reason for this club to exist.

Pix, Clair and I are doing a 5K at Crystal Palace a week on Sunday, and quite a few people are coming along to spectate (or mock, in Bernard’s case: “that’s not really running, mum, it’s just jogging.”) Come and join us!

Karen
  • Comments: 8
  • Bit late to the party but until this morning I had nothing to share. However, I can't sit ... - Lisa
  • Brilliant, well done everyone, especially Graybo for including himself, and Clare for bein... - Karen
  • I didn't play basketball on Monday. We try and play every week so looking forward to it ne... - Gordon
  • Huzzah for fitness club :) I'm not fit at all. Like, seriously unfit. But I did W1D1 of C2... - Clare
  • Hurrah! I now feel included! I've always been a walker, not a runner. I even married a ... - graybo
  • Comments: 7
  • Very like mine, which was *slightly* sniffingly called "mug cake". I like the sound of mar... - Lisa
  • Asta has found her tea loaf recipe: 1 cup black tea ( I used orange pekoe- a breakfast tea... - Karen
  • Absolutely. I will go o the hunt. You do realise I went off-piste, so I'll try to remember... - asta
  • Oh, I was *so* close! Would you share your recipe, Asta? - Karen
  • Lisa.... To you Lisa... My reading comprehension is still impaired. - asta
September 30, 2013

Birthday CDs

I got a few CDs for my birthday.

Caro Emerald – Deleted Scenes From The Cutting Room Floor

deleted_scenes_from_the_cutting_room_floorI remember the story of how this got onto my wishlist. Recently Karen and I were in London for the day, and things weren’t going so well. We were sat in a coffee shop feeling sorry for ourselves when You Don’t Love Me came on. The tempo and the rhythm was enough to cheer us up a little. The song was identified with the help of SoundHound, and the album was added to my wishlist straight away.

The rest of the album maintains that same standard. It’s immediately loveable, which can sometimes indicate that an album won’t really endure repeated listens, but honestly I don’t care. It makes me smile and makes me groove, and smiling and grooving are never a bad thing.

While listening to this album I was also struck with a faint embarrassment at how, on average, Dutch people seem to be better at speaking English than English people. It seems that the vast majority of Dutch people speak perfect English without any trace of an accent, whereas a shamefully large percentage of English people manage to desecrate their own native language, like, innit, lol. Wadthefugyewluukinatwanka?

The Antlers – Hospice

hospiceIt’s a mystery how this ended up on my wishlist. This is at the opposite end of the spectrum, it’s a concept album that probably requires repeated uninterrupted listens and meticulous studying of the lyrics to extract its full potential, not just something that you can pop on while driving. For the most part, it’s a very sparse album – when listening to it in the car, it sounds like nine minute intervals of silence interrupted by three minute blasts of noise. For now, I don’t feel qualified to judge it.

Foals – Holy Fire

holy_fireI can’t remember adding this to my wishlist either. It might have been a recommendation from Amazon, who knows? This is another album that grabbed me fairly quickly. It runs a fairly diverse rock gamut, from some somewhat discoesque stuff (like My Number) to meaty crunchier riffs. Inhaler is somewhat reminiscent of Eminence Front in the verses but with this fantastic fat guitar part in the chorus. I’m also reminded in place of Editors, . I always felt like Editors were a band that I should have liked, but didn’t, so Foals are putting that problem straight.

Fila Brazilia – Jump Leads

jump_leadsThe man that you know as Doctor Pockless is very funny. You see, my old set of jump leads (the automotive sort) were cheap and plastic and subsequently not very durable. Obviously they weren’t entirely plastic, as a certain amount of electrical conductivity is required in order for them to function. But they only contained metal teeth, and the rest of the handle assembly was plastic. Reader, they broke. They did not break in a minor, surmountable way. They broke thoroughly. They broke catastrophically. They broke in a way that prohibited future efficacy. They. Broke. So I added some really good, robust jump leads to my wishlist, with plastic grips on the handles (to stop you electrocuting yourself) but nice hefty metal moving parts. The good Doctor got me these and also, the witty critter, an appositely titled CD.

He tells me that it’s not even their best album, but I’m loving it. It weaves a very peculiar path and takes in all sorts of quirky sights along the way. It’s very difficult to review the album as a whole, because there isn’t really any common element running throughout. There’s some funky instrumental electronic disco stuff, and some jazzier songs with vocals. Everything from Mr Scruff to Zero 7. And then the last song is a ballad played on just two guitars, which is the last thing you’d be expecting. Supposedly this album has the purists in a tizzy, because putting vocals on a Fila Brazillia song is akin to Bob Dylan going electric. I have no dog in this fight, but I do always enjoy watching the apoplectic tirades of people with a weighty sense of entitlement.

Animal Collective – Centipede Hz

centipedeI find that upon first listening to any Animal Collective song, it all sounds a bit chaotic and questionable, but given time it all resolves itself and the melodies come to the fore. Personally, I’m very happy with this arrangement, because whereas most songs will start to sound bland and overfamiliar with time, Animal Collective songs actually settle down to a state where they retain a decent element of complexity.

However, the downside of this is that if you’re writing a review of an album after only listening to it 3 or 4 times then it’s hard to do it justice. When comparing this album to Merriweather Post Pavilion, I feel that it doesn’t quite strike that same perfect balance between great melodies and kooky sprinkles, but then maybe that will come with time? It’s as if that initial chaos isn’t fading quite as quickly as I was hoping it would, and there’s no way of knowing whether this is because it’s just taking a little longer, or if it’s not going to. Who knows.

Pete
  • Comments: 7
  • The content owner has not made this video available on mobiles. Fuck the content owner. - Pete
  • Nope. Still annoys me to death. - Karen
  • Oh, come on... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46g2jupgc08 (admittedly, the absence of voca... - Doctor Pockless
  • Fuckin Housemartins. - Karen
  • ...well, I hadn't meant to imply that being from Hull in any way conferred greatness. http... - Doctor Pockless